10. He cannot censor the pre-class entertainment top 10s
9. He is over 1000 miles away
8. Because Ryan’s perfect attendance is broken, he will not have to buy
himself lunch at the end of the quarter
7. For one weekend, Scott can feel what it’s like to live without a
brother
6. Mark moves one step closer on his plan to take over Edi Phi, and then
take over the world
5. People in Edi Phi are spared one week of hearing Ryan’s poster story
4. Ryan’s friend will be able to take breaks on the long and boring
moving trip to Kansas. I wish we could take breaks during Ryan’s long and
boring Sunday sermons.
3. The classroom does not smell like a day old fish
2. His roommates Nick and Brandon can trash his house…wait, they already
do that
1. People near the altar on Sunday night do not have to fear being
crushed by another altar fall
